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Each month, Sloane’s funny frankness echoes the experiences of young people and their choices.

A few nights ago, I had the most terrifying dream ever. If dreams are metaphors for real life, then I am screwed. And let me just clarify that I didn’t consume gallons of PCP before bedtime. I just drank a little NyQuil.

Anyways, I dreamt I was at work at Crispin Porter + Bogusky, only it wasn’t really work; it was just one of those weird dream locations that are amalgamations of a thousand different places you’ve seen in your lifetime.

So there I am, at my dream job* when I hear this horrible whirring sound, followed by buzzing and cracking and blood curdling screams. I look out the window of my office kitchen and a huge jumbo jet has crashed right in front of the building. Everyone is screaming and running around, it’s just pandemonium. I look out the window at the crash and I notice all these creatures spilling out of the crash. Then I see the creatures begin to take flight and everyone around me is screaming, “Aliens, they’re aliens!”

Being the conscientious employee that I am, I decide to lock everyone inside to hide from the flying creatures. I am trying my best not to look outside because these flying creatures are freaking me out; they’re freaking everyone out. I turn away from the window and close my eyes and then all of the sudden the yelling stops.

I slowly open my eyes and everyone I work with has turned to face me. There are about 100 expressionless people silently staring at me. Slowly they all turn forward and look out the window. I steadily turn my head around to look out the window and do you want to know what I see? A 7-foot tall flying monkey wearing a mask made of my bloody and swollen face.

What in the godforsaken hell does that dream mean? I spent a little time researching my dream on a free dream dictionary. It’s cool actually. You can search plane crash, monkey, office, kitchen, and blood to see what each word symbolizes in the dream world. For example, if you dream about salami that means you’re afraid about your public image (I swear that’s what said, I couldn’t make that crap up).

Walter: the cutest dog ever!

Walter: the cutest dog ever!

Apparently I’ve set unattainable goals and lack self confidence (plane crash), someone is about to upset me to advance their own self interest (flying monkey), and I’m severely overworked (office.)

Given my current waking situation I’d say my dream was right on. I work way too much, I was blamed for something at work that I was not involved in, and I think I may have signed up for one class too many. I’m so busy that I can’t even shake the sniffles that I’ve had for almost two weeks.

My first semester at FIU is almost over, as is my internship at CP+B. I’m glad that I decided to take on so much. I needed to prove to myself that I could do it all, and succeed. But right now, I don’t care about getting straight A’s or a job offer. I just need to cross the finish line before I completely burn out.

Or before I have any more dreams involving simians ripping off my face and wearing it around my office—whichever comes first.

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0 0 683 23 January, 2009 Columns, Scrambled January 23, 2009

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